Inuyasha's Lament
by DemonQueen17
Summary: After reading and re-reading "In The Blood" by sarhea, I couldn't help but write Inuyasha's feelings about Kagome and Sesshomaru's bonding in depth. I put in a few ideas of my own as well. Rated M for strong language.


Disclaimer: InuYasha and its characters are not mine

Disclaimer: _InuYasha _and its characters are not mine. I'd be one rich chick if it was true. Enough said.

Note: I read and re-read sarhea's "It's in The Blood" and I couldn't help but wonder what may have happened after Sesshomaru's and Kagome's bonding and eventually after the final battle with Naraku through Inuyasha's eyes and his feelings about everything that happens in depth. Sure, it's given that he hates the idea, but I wanted to write more of his POV and put in a few ideas of my own. Keep in mind that this is a possible "what if" for the hapless hanyou. No, I'm not pairing him up with Kikyo. I believe he shouldn't be limited to her as an alternative. I don't know who I'd pair him up with, if with anyone. It's a wait and see. Enjoy.

Note 2: This contains a lot of strong language. You were warned.

(Untitled for now)

As Inuyasha watched the blood bond ceremony between Kagome, the woman he truly loved, and Sesshomaru, the half-brother he despised more than ever, he couldn't help but feel sick to his stomach. The hanyou didn't know how much he could take as the ceremony continued on.

The reprimands he received from Kaede and Sango didn't change his feelings about fate uniting these two together. He voiced his opinion by growling, making rude statements, and making noises of protest. But deep down, as the ceremony ended and the couple retreated to their 'honeymoon' suite, Inuyasha realized that it was too late for him to do anything to stop Kagome from mating with Sesshomaru. If only he claimed the miko, he wouldn't be witnessing this mating.

As they consummated their mating, the hanyou mentally cursed whatever deities and fates out there for bringing the Western Lord and new Western lady together. He began to wonder of all the people in existence, why Sesshomaru? To the hanyou, he was nothing more than the arrogant, narcissistic, human-hating icebox of a taiyoukai half-brother who all but abandoned him. That son of a bitch didn't deserve someone as loving as Kagome. He should have been the one to claim her, not that asshole.

The disillusioned hanyou mostly blamed himself for basically pushing Kagome away, always comparing her to Kikyo, who now paled in comparison to her reincarnation, to her former self. Maybe it was that bitch called Fate who caused him to commit such acts. His human half clung to the past by pining for Kikyo. His youkai half blamed the undead shell of a miko for this union. It was this part of him that hated her for this. He mentally kicked himself for going to her every time like a stray dog looking for his master. Those damned Shindamachuu were always bait for Inuyasha and like a fish, he would always take it. She would always lure him away from his friends, from the woman he grew to love.

Kikyo was the center of his world. It didn't have to be if only Inuyasha had moved on from her. She was the past: dead for over 50 years. He knew this and continued to search for her anyway. But then again, Inuyasha was never meant to be with Kikyo either. If that were the case, they would have been happy without Onigumo/Naraku's interference. It was possible that Fate was responsible for throwing that huge wrench in their relationship.

Fate had never been kind to the hanyou. Both of the relationships he developed were ruined thanks to that fickle woman.

If only, if only, if only. Perhaps, this was another part of Fate's plan for the poor hanyou to unwittingly bring Kagome and Sessomaru together. Fate was a cruel bitch indeed.

The undead miko would always try to drag Inuyasha to hell for crimes committed by Naraku. His presence didn't help matters either. Perhaps, Sesshomaru and the new Western Lady could defeat the accursed hanyou by working together.

From the corner of his eye, he watched as Miroku and Sango look at each other with uncertainty. He could tell they really loved each other, but again Naraku had to be dealt with. Then there was the issue of the monk's Wind Tunnel. Miroku didn't have a lot of time left.

The look on Kaede's face told Inuyasha that she was extremely happy for the new couple. He couldn't take the outpouring of congratulations and joy from the crowd. He wanted to turn around and bolt out of the Great Hall, but something kept him from doing so. Instead he followed the crowd along with the rest of the group, keeping to the back.

All three knew how much the poor hanyou hated being here, but they would make sure that he would, as Kagome would say, "suck it up and get over it." To try and break the newly formed bond would alienate him from everyone that stuck by him to this point. And where would he be? Alone, before Kikyo first came into his life.

As the ceremony and the guests retired for the night in preparation for the reception, Inuyasha retired for the room prepared for him and slammed the door behind him. As he continued towards the door leading to the courtyard and leaned against the railing, he couldn't help but voice his opinion to whatever kami was listening and didn't care if any of the other guests heard either.

"I'm sure you're all happy with this bullshit mating, Fate, Destiny, whoever the hell you are. You're all probably laughing up there at this situation. Well, I want to know why you put Kagome with Sesshomaru. Sesshomaru?! Why him of all people?! I should have been Kagome's mate, not her brother, but no, you had to have her mate with that frigid asshole! That fucker doesn't deserve her. It ain't right! It ain't fair and you bastards know it! Damn it all to hell! If I can't be with Kagome or Kikyo, then who am I supposed to end up with?! Huh?!

Guess it's time I realized that clay shell isn't Kikyo. She's also the reason I'm not with the woman I truly love. You all planned this shit so Kagome and Sesshomaru could get together. You knew Kikyo was an important part of my past and you dangle my past in my face for your amusement. I care for her and vowed to avenge her death. That's it.

What the fuck happens now? Does Fate expect me to be happy for them? I'll never be happy about this! It's time I put Kikyo behind me. This is all bullshit. Fuck Fate for being such a fickle bitch." And with that tirade ended, the hanyou retired to a restless sleep, with tears in his eyes.

The reception went on without a hitch. Many of the taiyoukai present were overjoyed at the union and toasted the Lord and Lady of the Western Lands. Of course, Inuyasha said nothing, but did not want to ruin it for Kagome. He watched as the younger youkai looked at the couple with envy as they knew that nothing they said or did could tear them apart. The older, wiser mated youkai looked on with admiration.

Inuyasha saw how the new couple looked at each other with love in their eyes. He still hated the two of them being together, but he knew he had to learn to accept it. That bastard Sesshomaru better hurt Kagome or he had him to deal with. Then again he hurts himself in the process.

The hanyou was relieved when the reception ended and Kaede, Sango and Miroku personally gave the new couple their blessings after the youkai in attendance had returned home. He just wanted to leave as quickly as possible. But a part of him wanted to wish Kagome well. He didn't give a damn about Sesshomaru.

Inuyasha, being the stubborn hanyou he was, had his back turned to the rest of the group until Kagome decided to speak with him. They had a long conversation while Sesshomaru looked on and listened. Kagome let him know how much she cared for him, but not enough to break the bond between herself and her mate. She knew that together with Sesshomaru, they could defeat Naraku and take back the Shikon no Tama and also reassured him that he would find his own soul-mate, whoever they may be.

The hanyou replied with his trademark 'Keh' and told her if her mate did anything to hurt her, he'd give him a tongue lashing he'd never forget. He also told Kagome not to make any wishes on the accursed jewel, especially not to revive Kikyo. She was part of his past. The taiyoukai just smirked and approached his new Lady. He reassured Inuyasha that he would never hurt her the way he did by clinging to the past with Kikyo. Inuyasha only growled in response.

As they parted ways with the Lord and Lady of the West, Inuyasha couldn't help but wonder. If he wasn't meant to be neither Kagome nor Kikyo, who was he meant to be with? What did Fate have in store for him? Would someone he least expects become his soul-mate or was he destined to be alone? Only Fate and Destiny knew.

_Aw, man. That's it for now. Sorry if it was short. I figured since Kagome and Kikyo were born of the same soul and with everything that's happened, neither woman was meant to be with Inuyasha. I hate writing short chapters. I just couldn't think of anything else for this chapter. But I am going to fast-forward to after the defeat of Naraku. Anyway, later. _


End file.
